


Time Can Heal but This Won't

by sadtomatoboy



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Allura and Lance are Siblings, Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Cuban Lance (Voltron), Female Pronouns for Pidge | Katie Holt, Gay Keith (Voltron), Hunk & Lance (Voltron) Friendship, Hurt Lance (Voltron), Keith and Shiro are Adoptive Siblings, Korean Keith (Voltron), Lance & Pidge | Katie Holt Friendship, Lance (Voltron) Angst, Lance (Voltron) is a Mess, Lance (Voltron)-centric, Langst, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Supportive Allura (Voltron), This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, klance, klangst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-19
Updated: 2018-04-19
Packaged: 2019-04-25 02:50:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,707
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14369295
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sadtomatoboy/pseuds/sadtomatoboy
Summary: Lance is just trying to get better





	Time Can Heal but This Won't

**Author's Note:**

> this is t r a s h lol sorry but i have an idea
> 
> (also ill edit this later dont worry)
> 
> edit: lmao hey bitches yeah she didnt edit it
> 
> i did, ya boi, the [beta](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sitonmyface/pseuds/sitonmyface)

“Hey, Lance. How’ve you been?” Allura asked, concern evident in her voice.

Terrible, I thought. “I’m doing pretty good. I tried some new tea. I think it was called Oolong or something.” I didn't like it. I was more of a coffee person, but so was Keith. He liked his coffee strong and black, whereas I liked mine with extra creme and sugar. I used to drink a cup every morning, usually with him. Now, every time I even think about drinking coffee I feel sick. The mere thought of the diluted, bitter liquid filling my mouth and swallowing, feeling the scorching liquid run down my throat brings a flood of memories of him. Of our first date, of all the morning-afters we spent giggling in the kitchen, sipping the beverage, giggling, in love.

We weren't in love now, we weren't even friends. I hadn’t heard his voice in months, and that realization alone brought a sinking feeling to my stomach.

“Was it good?” she asked, just as I knew she would. Ever since we broke up she had started calling daily. She was my sister, and I loved her, but I think all I really needed was to be alone. Yeah, that's it. I just needed to be alone, take time to collect my thoughts.

“It was fine,” I lied. She knew I disliked tea. She knew it was a lie. I wasn't fooling anyone. It was obvious. I didn't like the tea, and I wasn't doing good.

She sighed, “Lance, listen, I know that you miss him, but you’ve got to move on. You can't keep living like this,” she said, and I almost felt bad. She sounded exhausted. Having to keep track of your twenty-four-year-old brother's mental health must be tiring. Though I doubted it could be as tiring as constantly weeping, seeing his face everywhere you go and wondering what went wrong, what you did wrong.

I fought the urge to argue, the urge to tell her that I didn't just miss him, that I still loved him and can never love again, muffling the screaming with a “Yes, I know. I’m trying my best.”

This pleased her, I guess, since she came back with a soft “Alright, I believe in you. You’ll conquer this, okay? I’ll call you later. I love you. Bye.”

“I love you, too. Bye,” I returned, ending the call.

  
☆☆☆☆☆

  
Allura had recommended on one of our previous phone calls that I make a list. I wasn't sure how making a list of all the things I loved about Keith was supposed to help me feel better, but I was desperate at this point. I would do next to anything at this point to get over him.

I sat down at my desk, ignoring the piles of paperwork I still had to do and pulled out a sheet of paper. This would be easy. After spending five years with him, I had come to love lots of things about Keith. All I had to do was write them down. I started with something simple, the snowball of despair growing and growing as the list continued.

 **Things I love about Keith Kogane**  
-His stupid mullet  
-His eyes  
-He can watch cat videos for hours at a time and not get bored  
-That ugly jacket he always wears  
-The way he feels in my arms  
-His omelets  
-His hands  
-His smile  
-His voice  
-Everything about him

I really don't get it. Allura said I could write them down and leave them, along with my sorrow, on the page. It was supposed to help, but all it did was worsen my mood, leaving my stomach with a hollow ache and my eyes with a prickling sensation.

All because while writing the list, I couldn't help but think of the first time Keith said he loved me. I can remember the first time he said it as if it were a moment recently lived instead of years ago, it was so vivid in my memory. I had taken him to Taco Bell because he had had a particularly rough day at school, and I was a broke college student so it wasn't going to be anything fancy. It was pretty sudden, and I didn't expect him to say it. He wasn't a huge fan of verbal expressions, preferring to show how he felt rather than saying it, so I would never have imagined that he would be the first to say it.

He had stopped eating, instead staring down at his lap after spitting the words out. It had taken me a few seconds to realize I was doing the in-person version of leaving him on read and had hurriedly informed him that I felt the same. When we got back to my place we had laid on the couch and watched Glee, sometimes breaking our attention from the show to share soft, loving kisses. It was one of the many nights like this we shared, but now they're over.

Then I heard a 'ping!' from across the room, notifying me that I had gotten a text. Probably from Hunk, who is the only person I’ve been talking to recently. I walked over to where it lay on my bed and checked it.

 **cHunk**  
_hey buddy, you wanna hang?_  
  
**Me**  
_yeah, where at_

 **cHunk**  
im _hella hungry, we can meet up at taco bell if you want_

I didn't really want to go to Taco Bell, but I didn't want to hang around my house all day either. Eating shitty Mexican food with my best friend was definitely the better option.

**Me**  
_sounds good is rn ok_

**cHunk**  
_yeah, see u there_

I grabbed my jacket and headed out the door.

☆☆☆☆☆

I spotted Hunk easily and made my way to the table. I noticed he didn't wait for me to order, so I headed up and got what I wanted.

I plopped down at our table, dragging Hunks attention away from his food and up to me. He smiled. “Uh, sorry I didn't wait.”

“It’s fine, what's brackin’?” I said, my laugh all too fake.

Hunk either didn't notice or didn't care. “Nothing, I hung out with Pidge last night. She misses you.”

Ah, Pidge. When the breakup happened I kind of cut her off. I didn't mean to, of course. I blocked everyone out, and only a few people wormed their way back in. Hunk was one of those people, as well as Allura.

I sighed. “Is she still mad?”

“No, she just wishes everything could go back to the way it was,” Hunk said, unwrapping his third taco. “I can't say I don't feel the same. I know you're struggling to get over him, but I miss the three of us hanging out, Lance. You should talk to her. She's not gonna hurt you, she's like four feet tall.”

I let out a laugh, this time one that was real. “Yeah, I should. I’ll call her when I get home.”

And we ate.

☆☆☆☆☆

When I got home I plopped on the couch, not bothering to take my jacket off. I pulled my phone out, I needed to text Pidge.

**Me**  
_hey fam_

It took a few minutes to get a reply, and I wondered if it was acceptable for me to go to sleep at four in the afternoon. When her reply came through, though, my heart began racing five times its average speed.

**Gremlin**  
_What the fuck do you want_

Pidge was never one for playing nice. If she was mad, you knew she was mad. She didn't even bother to hide it. Her temper would have bothered me if I weren't in such a good mood. Eating with Hunk never failed to brighten my day.

 **Me**  
i _think we both know_ wut i _want_

 **Gremlin**  
_ok_ do _you wanna meet up or just continue_ over txt

 **Me**  
_can u come over_

 **Gremlin**  
_yeah_ i'll _be over in a few_

Lance sighed, Pidge would have preferred texting. He would much rather text her, and he would have, too, but he really needed to see her in person. It would be easier, and there wouldn't be any misunderstandings. He was a grown man, he could deal with his problems up front.

By the time he got his nerves settled, Pidge was knocking on the door. He stood from the couch with wobbly legs and made his way to the door. He pulled the door open, and…

“Pidge, why are you holding a bowl of guacamole?”

“Why have you been ignoring me for the past month?”

“Okay, come in. The chips --”

“Are in the cupboard closest to the fridge. Yeah, I know. You act as if I haven't practically lived here for the past 6 years.” Yep, that was Pidge.

She grabbed the chips, and then she was back on the couch. Chip in mouth, eyebrows raised, waiting for my excuse. I sighed and plopped on the couch.

“I don't know, okay? I just kinda pushed everyone out,” I said as she crunched another chip.

“More like fucking shoved, but yeah. I get that, but why have you and Hunk been hanging out, then? Was I not good enough to be let back in?” Her words were clear, even being spoken through a mouthful of crushed corn chips and guac.

“I dunno, I guess he just kinda shoved himself back in. You just stayed away, which I was grateful for at the time, but I started missing you.” I admitted.

“Sick, I missed you too. ‘m glad the old you is back. Mopey you is not the best you,” she said, smiling.

I sighed. “I'm not fully back, but I'm working on it.”

She nodded. “I understand, it’s gonna take some time to get over him. Anyways, were you planning on having me over for a sleepover? I mean, if you weren't you'll just have to get over it. I'm not going home, we’re out of chips.”

I laughed. “I wasn't, but you can. You wanna watch something? We could-holy fuck Pidge we could watch season eight of Shameless oh my god.”

“Fuck yeah, put that shit on yesterday.”

And we spent the next five and a half hours doing just that.

 

**Author's Note:**

> i didnt know how to end this lmao shit
> 
> also fucking fuck the formatting got fucked up so sorry about that


End file.
